You...are the father!

Gone are the days when a man and a women made some form of agreement on monogamy before making sweet love to each other. Resulting oftentimes in offspring, spawn or a tiny bundle of...whatever.

In the golden age of getting it on, the woman ( more times than not) had a clear idea who the baker is of the bun in her oven.

It is quite obviously a new day, a new generation and a new way to make sure that the right man is paying the child support. I guess the best part about it, is that now you don't have to embarrass yourself on Maury!

The kind people over at IdentiGene developed a home paternity test. It's right in the family planning isle, between the Trojans that are ribbed for HER pleasure, and the home pregnancy tests.

OK so the test itself costs about $30 dollars. You then have to collect some DNA ( willing or forcefully, but by any means necessary) by swabbing the inside of the individuals mouth.

"The samples, along with consent forms and a lab fee are sent in an enclosed postage-paid return envelope to Identigene for processing. Results are available from Identigene within three to five business days of receipt. Customers can choose to receive results by mail, email, or online through a secured Web service."

And voila! You now know who your baby-daddy is. The lab fee is $120, but that's worth the peace of mind right.

To quote the great Will Ferrell, this is mind bottleing to me ( yeah you know, mind bottleing, like when your thoughts get all mixed up and trapped...like in a bottle).What other home testing kits are on the pharmaceutical pipe-lines? Will this test stand up in court? Can it be used for evil? All I have to say is, guys be careful with your DNA, it can or maybe used against you in a court of law.